Hana's Epiphany & The Power of Thoughts

Greetings Magnificent Souls to the Attract Health Build Wealth Blog where we have open and honest discussions about ourselves. 

This is a place where we breakdown, breakaway, and breakthrough codependency allowing ourselves to attract health, build wealth, and live a peaceful life.

We are tired of being sick and tired. We are tired, but we are not giving up. We KNOW that there is something magnificent inside of us.

Because we are fighting daily, hourly, and by the minute: fighting ourselves, our kids, our spouses, we have to do things differently. 

We have to break the cycle. We don’t have a million chances. We have to be happy, NOW. We have to find a way. So how do we do that? How is that possible?

If you look around at what society is telling you, they’d tell you that what we’re doing is impossible. 

Yet, it’s happening. 

Every. 

Single. 

Day. 

It’s happening through the practice and love that we call Awakening the Magnificent Soul.

We are all Magnificent Souls, and these are our stories of healing!

Today on Episode 56, I dive deep into a listeners’ epiphany, talking about life goals and feelings of worthlessness, and recreating the patterns of our past.

But, before we get into the discussion, don’t forget to let me know your thoughts about this episode, any feedback you have or anything you would like me to cover on future podcasts at epiphanyvault.com Remember, it is a safe place and I would welcome the discussion.

One big announcement today before we get started is that I am called to open more spots in the next coming weeks for my Codependent to Connected 1:1 Coaching Program. This is the opportunity to really get to the root of your codependency, self-love and relationships. My clients learn to love themselves, create the lives that they have always dreamed of, and find the greater calling that they are feeling down deep. This is door opening healing to all the things that you are wounding you deeply. If you are feeling stuck, this is the place to be. I am not opening it up now, but I AM opening up the waiting list. This list will be first priority. If you’d like to get on the waiting list for the Codependent to Connected 1:1 Coaching Program, just go to www.attracthealthbuildwealth.com/waitlist and I will reach out to you. I know its scary, but you are worth it.

So, on to the program for today, a listener by the name of Hana wrote in to the Epiphany Vault and gave me permission to share with you all today. Here’s what she wrote:

“hi,  I really relate to your podcast, thank you so much for your work.

I've just learnt the label for how I've been feeling for the past 30 odd years is codependent. 

I'm really struggling, as a mum of 2 boys under 2, with feeling not good enough. If I shout I feel so much guilt and that they will end up hating me. 

I believe my mum was a narcissist and she doesn't communicate with neither me or my brother, my dad died 10 years ago. I really felt abandoned growing up and that I had to play the parent role. 

Now I find making decisions, setting and sticking to boundaries and listening and caring about other people's views and opinions. I really feel worthless most days. I enjoy special moments with kids but it's often gained with feelings of guilt, shame or regret or ruminating and over analyzing. 

I'm really sick of being mentally exhausted and wasting my time with all this baggage and shit.

I aim to create a property investment business over the next year and  really want to be confident, trust my own decisions and feel good about myself and really be the mum I want my kids to have, not the one I had!”

Oh Hana, thank you so much for writing in. Thank you for being so open with your story and with your life.

Thank you so much for sharing.

Before I touch on your entry, I do want to share my disclaimer that I am a Freedom from Codependency Coach and not a medical or therapeutic professional. This podcast and my views are based off of my experiences only. If you feel the need for professional help, I encourage you to find support in that way.

So, on to Hana’s entry and I’ll spend all of our time today on it because I think she brings up so many good things to talk about.

First, I want to send out healing energy to you, Hana, if you are listening.

I know what it feels like to be where you are mentally and emotionally.
It’s alienating and lonely and very difficult.

But, I want to assure you of a few things, one, that I am here and that I hear you, and, because you were so generous with your epiphany, there are many others who can hear and feel you too. 

And two, just having the courage to come forward and share this is a brave act in and of itself.

Shame and guilt are MONSTER feelings that are so invasive. They really tend to take over our lives. 

I am sending you the potential and the permission for kindness as you witness these thoughts. I, actually, included this in today’s epiphany episode about the strength and power of these thoughts.

As much as we might think these thoughts define who we are, there are ways to distance ourselves from these thoughts. They DO HAVE power, there is no question, but we will die in our hearts if we cannot take that power away.

The first step is a deep awareness of these thoughts. 

When you really hone in on awareness, it happens automatically, but as you are starting out, it is very difficult to do. Why? Because they have been running your whole life for so long.

The thing is though, it leads to pain.

So, let’s try something different because the old way isn’t working. Shall we?

Here’s my plug for meditation: meditation really really really helps with this. I started off with the Headspace app and recommend it to all of my clients. 

Now, my personal meditation practice has evolved to deeper forms of meditation, but meditation teaches you how to be an observer of your thoughts.

Just as if you were sitting on a bench in a park and your thoughts just walk right by. They don’t sit down on the bench with you and start poking at you. You can just exist perfectly even with thoughts.

The things that you are telling yourself about meditation are things that I have, also told myself.

They are: 

I can’t do it.

I’m not good at it.

I don’t have the time. 

I can’t find a quiet space.

These are not your thoughts. These thoughts are coming from the deep, unhealed wounds you are harboring in your body.

Whether you know it or not, these wounds don’t want you to get better. 

So, they will keep you in the place that you are now.

Don’t believe them.

A practice like meditation is growth. Therefore, a practice like meditation will be uncomfortable and different.

Those are good!

That means that you are growing and learning!

Hana, I would, also recommend that you find objective support to help you heal your unhealed wounds. It’s okay that you have them. I do, mine pop up. Many people have them, but few people, at least right now, have the courage to heal them.

I would recommend groups, therapy, and/or a personal coach or motivator like me or someone like me. I’ve shared this many time, but I have a whole support team and will have that support from now until I die. Look for people that have done what you want to do and you will be in a great spot. At least, that’s what I did. 

The growth that I have experienced when I finally was able to open up to this healing circle was immense. My upward trajectory even surprises me sometimes. 

When you really tap into your unhealed wounds, it spreads to all parts of your life, even your relationship with your boys. 

You are worth it and so are they.

Thank you so much, again, Hana for writing in.

Sending out love and healing to you.

Livin and lovin,

Lilli