Healthy Support

How many times have you felt unsupported?
How many times have they said one thing but you felt another?
How many times have they said things to you that were hurtful more than helpful? Or that didn’t land well?
How many times was it hard to know how you felt & were able to express your feedback from the heart & not from the head?

Personally, check…all of them check.

After some internal exploration, I’ve come to understand that “feeling” supported really comes down to being seen & heard.
Fully, wholly, & with no judgment.

The problem is, is that if we are repeatedly not seen & heard for who we truly are, for our mistakes, for our growth, for our dreams, & for our desires, we lose them.
And in turn, we lose all sight of ourselves.

Then, “support” can become blaming, victimization, & deep shame that you can’t shake.
It’s a nasty cycle that doesn’t serve your highest good.

Until the last few years, I didn’t know what true, healthy support felt like. Even when I would catch my friends up on what was going on, it was about what I was doing or achieving.

Which is great, but not so great if it’s blocking me from my deep heart.

There is an anxiety that calls out to be seen from our deep hearts.

That’s where anxious attachment really pops up.
We have to know that we are “okay” & they are “okay.”
If they don’t answer for a bit, we get nervous & our thoughts spiral into negativity.

And instead of being strong & aligned in ourselves, we find our strength & alignment in others.
All in an effort to be seen & heard like we want to.

This strategy is dangerous & unsustainable.
It pushes the good things & good people in our lives away.
And it’s frustrating when we can’t seem to stop.

Love, I gotchu.

The answer to this is in you.
Allowing yourself the opportunity to heal that part of you that wants to be loved, & seen, & heard is easy if you are ready to open up to a different kind of support than you’ve ever received.

The peak of your life happens when you heal.
Your romance..
Your friendships..
Your job..
Your money..
Only exist in your life to serve you.

Healing is for you.
Your magnificence is waiting to bloom.

In big love,

💗Lilli